Dec 6, 2006

MY TUESDAY

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I had to go to Long Island Jewish Hospital yesterday. I had to be there at 10am, which means I met a fair amount of traffic. It is about an hour away from me but I managed to make it in 45 minutes. It could have been the road rage that turned me into an Indy driver but I wish the fuck I was driving a tank with missile capabilities. A lot of motherfuckers woulda bit the dust yesterday. After watching Anger Management the other night, I figured out, well, it reminded me that I am the kind that implodes and explodes. I'm usually even keeled but I have been diagnosed as Passive-Aggressive. You'll get away with shit for a while and then all of a sudden, I'm up in your face like a pit bull and you're wondering if I am really insane or not.
People are just assholes and I'm surprised more people aren't killed by drive-by shootings on the highway. But one thing I did notice, that the biggest assholes are the ones in the most expensive cars. High-n-Mighty, they drive around as if they're untouchable. They assume that everybody is civilized and they run their game and pretend they are the predator. I have Hep C, as you all know. When the Doctors say, "Babs, you're at the end of your rope," I just may very well be at the end of my rope and go out in a bang. First, I'll make a list of the assholes in my life. Then, I'm gonna start driving and God help you if you get in my way, especially all you pretentious pricks in your big money cars. Wishful thinking!
So, I get to the Doctors and meet up with the Receptionist with a big fucking feeling attitude. Have you ever noticed that most assistants and even the office help at any Doctors office are usually of a Piranha nature? I think they get an attitude, better than thou, fuck all you pion patients, I am, "The Doctors fluffer and you better fuck off," mind set. Do they have to be trained to behave as if their shit comes out in zip-lock baggies and doesn't smell?
My insurance requires that I have a referral and after 4 visits, another referral. I've been to the Doctor three times before that and should've had at least one more visit w/o the referral. Now, I'm already antsy cause I just drove here and wanted to commit a homicide on at least 3 different occasions. I never flipped so many people off in less than one hour that I can remember but I'm driving, knowing that I'm headed to the Dr.'s for a shot straight into my elbow of a mix of Cortizone and Lidocaine and something else and I'll tell you what, it hurts like a bitch. But now, I gotta deal with this prissy prima donna swipe to boot. No, boys and girls, I was not amused.
Image Hosted by ImageShack.usShe pulls out my file and begins to tell me I've got no referral for todays visit but in fact have none for two other visits and I will be billed for those and they can not be back dated. "You'll have to get on the phone with your Primary physician and get a referral for today and I just can't help you with these other visits, you'll have to pay out of pocket for that," and she snickers. I pull out my cell phone wishing it was actually a remote control for a bomb and blow us all to hell, let God sort 'em out, ya know. After she tells me I'll have to call my Dr., she picks up the phone and calls somebody and they supposedly tell her that they will not send the referral. "You'll have to reschedule. Do you want to be seen on Thursday?" I said, "No, I don't want to be seen on Thursday, I happen to have a life. Now, should I call my Doctors office back to get todays referral? I really hate to call them as they can be savory." She has a puzzled look on her face, "What do you mean savory?" I get a weird smile on my face and tell her, "They really hate it when I call them for referrals. I just called the other day for another referral and the woman got nasty with me. I did put her in her place and went up to the Doctors office and invited her to go outside with me and I wasn't asking her to go out for coffee, get my meaning? I really hate when people, who have no God given right to get shitty with me, think they can talk to me any kinda way. Don't you just hate pretentious people? I happen to have an aversion to them and will go out of my way to explain this, completely. You know break it down in terms they won't soon forget" and I smile real sardonically. I've now arrived at a point of no return. A point, just prior to going back to prison. A point where I just don't give a fuck but I still pick and choose my words carefully but they're chock full of innuendo. She got my drift and is now ashen white, scratching her head and just says, "Yes." Another woman comes over, who must have been listening to me, after all, my voice has become assertive bordering aggressive and they're all looking at me. The other woman looks at my file and points out to the woman that the recorded entries show that I canceled this appointment and the other two are telephone contacts, not appointments. And in actuality, I have this and another visit before I need the referral. She looks at me, smiles, winks and says, "Have a seat Ms. Moore, the Doctor will be with you momentarily.
Nobody died on Tuesday and they all lived happily ever after. The End

4 comments:

.Ophelia. said...

I have some chloroform sitting in my medicine cabinet if you need any. It might help make time pass while your making your list of road rage victims.

;o)

RICH said...

sounds like you could use a little decompression. I suggest you go get a nice relaxing massage. and repeat the words "these things happen" it works for me.

Babsbitchin said...

ophelia, I wonder if you can get hooked on chloroform? Maybe, I'll just sit around and huff it myself, you know like glue. Then, I don't have to deal with these assholes, lol!

Babsbitchin said...

Rich,implosion is on the menu lately. You may be right but I'll opt for sex, instead of massage. This could be what's wrong with me. It's been a year and I have none like a nun. Some poor bastard gonna get wrecked in bed, lol!