Feb 9, 2007


Reading Babs Bitching is more fun than killing roaches...

I'm home from work, due to my surgery, so, I'm kinda cheating and re-posting a few things here and there, from my old blog, Bitchin & Stuff.

This is one my all time favorite video's. Old school shit, it'll make you laugh!
Copper Clappers

Johnny Carson - Copper Clappers - video powered by Metacafe
Go smoke a Philly Blunt and watch this one

Van Prank

Keep Me Busy


Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Q. I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true?

A. Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it...don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. want to live longer? Take a nap.

Q.Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?

A. You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables . So, a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass(green leafy vegetables). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.

Q. Should I reduce my alcohol intake?

A. No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made from grain. Bottoms up!

Q. How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?

A. Well, if you have a body and you are fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one,etc.

Q.What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?

A. Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No pain...Good.

Q. Aren't fried foods bad for you?

A. YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!! Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?

Q. Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting soft around the middle?

A. Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only do sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.

Q. Is chocolate bad for me?

A. HELLO...Cocoa beans! Another vegetable!! It's the best feel-good food around!

Q. Is swimming good for your figure?

A. If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me!?

Q. Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?

A. Hey, round IS a shape!

*Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets. And remember: "life is NOT to be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways- Chardonnay in one hand-chocolate in the other-body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming, "WOO HOO, WHAT A RIDE!!

Wow, What A Woman

I can bring home the bacon,
fry it up in a pan,
serve it on a dish in my lip,
and never let you forget your a man,
Cause I'm a woman!

*optional matching beer coasters available!

I know it does't rhyme but I made this up in prison on a homemade card. Oh yea, I got skills!



Webmiztris said...

looks like you could play that lady's lip like a bongo!!

.Ophelia. said...

ooooh that looks painful. Just like the women that would put rings aorund their necks and stretch them...

I like reposting old posts. Its good to be lazy ;o)

Babsbitchin said...

webmiztris, how about those guys that stretch their dicks on a stick. Eeeeew, sounds like a bad Chinese menu, Stretched Dick on a Stick!

Babsbitchin said...

Ophelia, it just makes you grateful that stiletto's and high heels attract our man, not the biggest plate, right? Yes, reposts are all the rage, huh? lol

It's Me, Maven... said...

In hindsight those gals in the plate lip tribe should consider themselves lucky that they aren't members of the wok or pressure cooker lip tribes....

Babsbitchin said...

Maven, oh fuck your killin me here, lol!